For 14k, I expected bigger.

This is it. This is what we hiked 14k- that's 8.69 miles people- to see. Can we talk about this for a second?

I'm not "fit". I don't "exercise", or "take care of my body". I have been told I have "cholesterol problems", and that I am "obese". I'm not arguing any of these points. But 14k? People train for a really long time to do this kinda thing. What the hell were we thinking?

But this isn't about whether we "should have" attempted a 14k hike through a Thai jungle in the mountains. It's not about whether we were "prepared" with things like "water", or "food". It's about the waterfall.

I mean, come on people. It's pretty. It is. But that does not justify 14k.

See this?

We followed a sidewalk about a quarter mile, and boom. Beautiful waterfall. Why did I hike 14k to get something so much lamer? (lamer? more lame? not the point...)


My next issue is the "path". I don't know if you can tell, but this is a treacherous trail, roughly a foot wide, wrapping around the side of a mountain. It's also, just to keep it interesting, strewn with roots, large rocks, and leaves that conceal where the "path" has decided that 12 inches is just making it too easy and decided to shave a little off the sides.

All of this at a 45 degree angle.

Amongst backpackers this kind of thing is among the most popular things to do. They call it "trekking". I call it "stupid". And now that I officially have a full blown trek under my belt I intend to never ever do it again.

...except for this spot in Indonesia, where you catch the sunrise from the top of a volcano. That actually catches my interest. I hate it, I really do, but come on... it's a volcano at sunrise.

No word yet on whether sunset is also an option.


Random Quote:
Al (discussing American football): Do you know who the quarterback is?
Angel, the South African model: Of course I do. The quarterback is the cute boy in the movies.

Gotta love it.

Let's talk bad ideas.


Ok, hint: It's not sunset on an idyllic island off the coast of Northern Thailand. I'll give half credit if you said my choice to rock the sleeveless shirt, the arms are a bit flabby, I know, but it's just so damn comfortable that I can't make myself care.

If you thought "Holy crap!!! Who the hell gave Al the keys to ANYTHING with two wheels and an engine? And what made Jen get on the back? Is she %&^#@ crazy!?!? And, for the love of all that is holy, WHY AREN'T THEY WEARING HELMETS?" Then I'd say, "Whoa, whoa, calm down there Mr./Ms./Mrs. Freakypants. There's nothing to be concerned about. We took the helmets off for the picture. They're clearly sitting in the little basket on the front.

Ok, wanna see a worse idea?

That's right. Not only did I learn to drive this thing in a foreign country at the same time I learned to drive on the left side of the road for the first time, a few days later I taught Jen. Ha! We're wacky.

Time to talk toilets people.

Now this, you spoiled Americans, is a standard western toilet. See if you can figure out what's a little off by the time we come back to it.



This beauty is the standard around much of Southeast Asia. Notice that while it does have the beginnings of a Western toilet, it's missing something. Not the seat- well, ok, yes, the seat, but that's because this was a bus transfer stop. Not even a bus station- this is where you waited after you rode your first bus to ride the second bus. Point is, most have seats.

The thing that's missing is the big tank that assists in the flushing. Sans that, we instead use that big black garbage can with the pretty pink bowl. The garbage can is filled with water, and you use the pink bowel to pour it into the toilet, and the water pressure causes a flush. Sort of. As the sign in the corner indicates, toilet paper doesn't go in the toilet.

But if you wander a bit into the sticks, or just happen to guess wrong, you get one of these bad boys.


Say hello to the squatter. The physics of these gets a little graphic, but you get the idea. Not fun. These also come in the "pour bucket" variety for those who want the joys of trying to do their thing in the woods, but with a much more disgusting smell and less hygiene. They were also really popular in Seoul. No idea why.

Speaking of graphic...


Don't feel bad if you didn't catch it- notice the lack of toilet paper? How about the spray hose on the wall? Yup.

I haven't the foggiest idea how in the WORLD that's suppose to work. But it's what the natives do. I know what you're thinking. No, I haven't tried. And yes, I'll ask. I just have to find someone who speaks English well enough to explain, and won't be totally embarrassed at telling me. I probably won't post the answer, though. It just can't be good.

Ok, running out of time here. But guess what I got?

SIGN TIME!!!! It's not just for Korea anymore.


These dotted the trail to our less than ideal waterfall. And sure, the trail after these were places where injury wasn't just possible, it was likely, but looking at it I kept feeling like that guy was having way more fun than me...

We'll be in Malaysia in about 2 days. More to come!

-Al & Jen

Photos and Youtube!

Ok, I hope this works.

If you click here you should be able to go to a photo album of the wanderings of your favorite duo. I've tried to include captions and things. I'll still post the blogs, with pics, but this I'll add as we go. It's a thing with the amount of space I get on blogspot, and me fiddling around with new dork stuff.

Speaking of which, we also loaded a few videos on YouTube. If you search for Wanderingandrambling (our profile name) you should be able to see the videos. I'm not certain, though, because YouTube and the internet cafe are fighting.

NOTE- There's a ton of spelling mistakes in the captions. Layne, no. Dan... NO....

Love ya! Miss ya!

-Al (& Jen)

Bangkok Dangerous?

Hey everyone!

Ok, so the laptop doesn't do so well with this whole "internet" thing unless it has "access". I don't follow, personally, but there is a lovely internet cafe here in Kanchanaburi, Thailand so the blogging will not be interrupted.

Our flight here was uneventful. I didn't mention the six hours we spent in the Beijing airport. That sucked. A lot. I mean, huge Oh-My-God-Are-We-Still-Here amounts. So, you get to look at a picture of it.


Somehow, it doesn't quite capture the experience, but it'll have to do. After that ridiculously long layover we finally hopped on 5 and a half hour flight to Bangkok.

Ok, I'm just going to put this out there. Microsoft owes the Thai people a lot of money. Here's why.

Tell me those aren't wingdings. Microsoft totally ripped off Thailand. Not cool, Bill Gates. Not cool.


We started out at the Soi1 Guesthouse in Bangkok. The place was, overall, great. The first night we simply crashed, but the next day we got to met some really interesting people, and that evening we ventured out into the Bangkok nightlife. Jen and I behaved ourselves, but some of the folks we were traveling with got themselves into some situations that... well, let's say that they'd have been arrested back home.

Speaking of home, here's a tale to tell.

I'm sitting in the hostel's common room chatting with some fellow travelers. We were discussing standards of living between Thailand and the West, leading me to share something that my mother shared with me- that being born in the USA (or, for the company, the UK, Australia, South Africa, and I believe somewhere in the Scandinavia area) was winning the "birth lottery," everyone smiled and nodded politely, except for Silvia. She was a beautiful young lady from London that said, and I can't make this up, that she sometimes wishes she was born in a 3rd world country.

JUSTIN- Your comments for this blog is hereby limited to 500 words or less...

We'll ignore the obvious struggle to survive, find food, and avoid the ravages of, on occasion, 1000's of years of war and famine. We'll ignore corruption on a scale unheard of in the USA, or atrocities such as female circumcision or children being forced to work as soldiers. We'll ignore all of this for the simplicity of life, and the family structure.

Granted, I come from a family with divorced parents. But somehow, someway, I feel like my brother and I managed to overcome this hardship, and while I can't say for certain, I'm thinking he'd agree that divorce was easier than watching our family members die from diseases that are cured as a matter of course in the USA. But who knows, maybe Dan also yearns for that family structure to the point that a parent selling his daughter into prostitution because that's her best chance at a better life is not such a big deal.

(long, slow, sigh) Better now.

No, I didn't unload on her that way. I began to gently point out the lunacy of that claim when another girl joined her side, and I remembered that I've got about 5 years on most of these folks, if not more, during which point apparently the brain finishes developing. I watched Shaun Of The Dead instead. Nice.

I gotta say, I liked Bangkok a lot. It is not a town for the feint of heart, to be sure. This city takes New Orleans and Las Vegas combined for stuff that ain't kosher, but the people are so kind and helpful. Hardly anyone stared at us as we ventured around, and were happy to welcome us (and our money) wherever we went. We sat and ate at stalls along the side of the road, and the people were kind enough to ask whether we actually wanted the food spicy. Which, it turns out, I'm developing a taste for...

But back to the not as pleasant stuff, because lets be honest, it's more interesting.

-Jen and I wandered around a really popular night market on Saturday night. We knew it was located next to a popular red light district, but after Gerium we weren't all that concerned. So we're looking at all the different wares when a man approaches with a laminated menu to show us. We make it a point to ignore anyone who approaches, but we glanced at the menu. We both thought we were looking at a list of drinks, maybe cocktails. Turns out they were shows available not far away. Disturbed, and to be honest, a little confused, we hurried on.

-Did I mention how cynical Jen and I are? We've got code words for when we think trouble is afoot, and even make sure we stand perpindicular to each other when we're wearing our backpacks to avoid pickpockets. We've had no trouble at all, partly because we're careful to a fault. Unlike our friend... he decided to go hit up one of the big foriegner "party zones" with some folks from the hostile. After getting entirely too drunk, he left his friends and contiuned partying. He came to sitting on a concrete stump several hours later to a small crowd of Thais and a Thai police officer poking him with a stick. He found he was missing his wallet, MP3 player, and a few other things. Luckily for him his passport and ATM were still on his money belt under his clothes, but some of the locals felt bad and paid a taxi to run him back to a section of town he belonged in. He says he's pretty sure he was drugged- not sure I buy that, but a 22 year old foreign guy very drunk and wandering alone in that part of town is kinda asking for it, I'm afraid.








Also, here's an elephant in downtown Bangkok. Note the lack of a huge crowd of people jostling and yelling 'Holy shit! There's an elephant in the middle of the city!'


Ok, I'm bored. I'm hoping to pet a tiger for my birthday tomorrow. Yea for me!

First Impressions of Bangkok

Hey everyone! Thanks for the warm wishes.

We've been in Bangkok a little less than 12 hours. We really made a good call on our hostel- I emailed the owner of the hostel, and he sent us directions to give the cab driver in Thai. I printed it out, made some copies, and kept one folded up in my wallet. It was the best move we made. The visa desk at the airport wanted to know where we were staying, and their English wasn't great. After a moment of confusion, I gave her the slip. She laughed and Jen and I went through quickly. ::phew::

The taxi drive got us here quickly, and without incident. It was pink, much to Jenn's delight, and they drive on the left here. After our arrival, we found our room. We're sharing a room with 6 others, one of the smaller rooms, but it has air conditioning and it was clean. We slept wonderfully. Jen's still asleep. It's around 10am, local time.

First thoughts-
It's a lot harder to tell who the locals are. In Korea the look is very homogeneous. Here there is a wide variety of people. But they seem very friendly, and helpful.

Backpackers are much friendlier than teachers. We've only met about 4 other backpackers, but all of them have been engaging.

Ok, computer battery is dead... more later!

-Al & Jen

Made it!

We're here, write more later.

-Al

So Long Seoul

Hello Readers!

Well, here we go again. All of my worldly possessions are back into boxes and bags, though now on two continents. We leave in about 15 hours for Bangkok. A flight leaving Seoul will drop us in Beijing for 6 hours before another flight gets us to Bangkok, estimated arrival around midnight. We'll be lucky to see our beds by 2am.

Dear Lord, are we excited.

So how are we doing at the end of our tour here in Korea? Well, let's see..

• We didn't make it the full year, something that irks us both. But the stories coming from PLUS in the 5 days since we left are enough to confirm that, if anything, we stayed too long.
• The biggest noticeable difference is the weight loss. I arrived in Korea weighing in around 245 lbs. I leave weighing right about 215 lbs. It'll prolly be coming in around 200 lbs. by the time I get stateside again.
• Less fantastic is the sudden paleness I've noticed. All this time in a big city, with winter, is just making me more and more pale. I hate it. Plus, all this time wearing jeans actually wore the hair off parts of my legs. I'm looking forward to flip flops and cargos again.
• Speaking of which, this winter thing sucks. When I blogged earlier about it I talked about the snowball fights and the snowmen, and left out the hell that is winter. The black slush that just covers the whole damn city is disgusting and maddening. I'm tired of having a stuffy nose, and it taking fifteen minutes to get dressed to go outside. You want a white Christmas? Great. Go north, take pictures. Don't mess up my home with your prayers for snow...
• Did I mention I'm tired of the cold?
• This part feels like a game show: if Jen and I pack up now and come home (not gonna happen), played it safe and waited on the exchange rate we'd have 17k in our pockets. Nuts, huh? If we travel and spend some we'll have less, obviously, but there is a chance we can make even more than we thought. So do we take the money, or see what's behind door number 2? (The answer is Door #2... hopefully you've already figured that out)

I promised pictures.



This is the staff of Rocky Mountain Tavern, where I spent entirely too much time. These guys were amazing. They are, from left, Julie in the white, Thor is the guy above her, Sarena is the one whose face is poking between Jen and I. She quit a few months back, as did the girl in black on the other side of me (I don't remember...) Hi-yah is above and behind Jen, Joy is in the green, Ronin is the one looking confused. That last duo has Jackie Chan with Don Juan on his shoulders. Hopefully a few of them will make the jump across the pond- they were a trip.



Here's a picture of Al's Korean Wives- Angel, Rachel, Whatsherface, and Jennifer. Don't get worried, they're only Korean wives. They don't count in the USA. Except Whatsherface, apparently. She thinks she's coming to Bangkok with me.


This is Drew. He wore Guiness pajama pants with a belt to brunch on Sunday morning. Now, you could point out that we have brunch at a bar, but that's not the point. The point is he wore a belt with pajama pants. And that is AWESOME. Drew and I have been tearing apart Seoul alongside the gents in the next picture. I think you'll get a chance to meet them...


This is Harrison, aka Tank, Mike, and some goofy lookin old guy. I don't have time to get into why he's called Tank. Just trust me, he deserves it. But I *do* have time to tell you he's Jewish, and I got his bacon at breakfast. Friend Status: Confirmed.


Here's some random pretty girls to make all of you single guys feel dumb for not coming to Korea with us. See how sad they are?!?!


:::LONG PAUSE:::

Ok, now it's around 6am. We still haven't slept, but I gotta get this out before I go. We're off like a rocket, folks. Say a prayer.

But we are, for better or worse, bringing the laptop. Wifi is plentiful in Southeast Asia, and the streets are made of cheese. So sayth Fivel.

We'll try to post when we land, if only a line or two. We love you!!!!!

-Al & Jen

Cambodian Orphans

Hey everyone!

I'm posting one more picture filled post before heading to parts unknown, but this one isn't going to be it. This one is actually about where we're heading later.

You may have heard Jen and I mention that we were looking at possibly volunteering at an orphanage in Cambodia. Our friend Melissa, one of the most amazing people I've ever met, by the way, has been globe trotting for several months now. She told us about it before we she left, and when I asked her about it yesterday she directed me to her blog.

A few notes before you follow the jump-
1. It's sad. Really, really, this sounds fake sad.
2. Melissa is a better writer than I am. No fair jumping blogs.
3. I had a stronger desire to rally some support for these guys the second I read what Melissa had to say. I am, however, a cynic. I'll wait and see for myself, but if Mel's right (she normally is) Jen and I will be looking for organizations back home to help support them.
4. Yes, we'll be careful.
5. Yes, we'll be careful.
6. Yes, we'll be careful.
7. Yes, we'll be careful.
8. Mom, I get it. Yes, we'll be careful. Promise.

Ok, now that you've read my intro, go here. But not if you have a date or something where you have to be happy. Then wait and do it later.

-Al